Green Smoothie (’cause you thought you were so smooth last night)

6 Nov

Beer.  Pretzels.  Chips.  Peanuts.  Jack ‘n Coke.  Cigars.  Maybe even dairy.  What do we do when our non-vegan loved ones binge and drink a little too much?  Sure, they think they’re so smooth when they’re tipsy and a cigar seems like a great idea.  But the morning after ain’t so smooth.

Despite the fact that he complains when I force feed him a green smoothie, my husband will beg me to make one after he’s had a night of naughty food and beer.  Yeah, he sometimes strays from my food, but always comes back to what he knows is good for him.

I started making green smoothies after reading Victoria Boutenko’s book Green Smoothie Revolution.  In it she explains the diet of a chimpanzee, which has the most genetic similarity to us, and hence possibly the best example of a diet good for us.  In their daily diets, chimps consume half their food as fruit, and almost the rest of it as green leaves (with a small percentage of barks and seeds, and a very small amount of bugs).  Well, when you are a chimp, or pretty much any animal other than a human, your main objective in life is to eat.  So therefore, you can spend all day chewing on leaves.  We humans don’t.  So Victoria Boutenko began blending her greens in order to drink them quickly and increase her consumption of them.  But they tasted awful!

Then Victoria read one of Jane Goodall’s chimpanzees books and came across an observation of chimps rolling up a piece of fruit into a large green leaf and eating it like a sandwich.  While some people believe we shouldn’t combine fruits and veggies in the same meal, this innovative chimp culinary creation inspired Victoria to try blending fruits with her greens, thus creating green smoothies.  The rest of her book concisely explains the nutritional specifics of green smoothies and provides many recipes.  Below, however, is the one I created based on what was in my fridge today.

After getting that green smoothie request from my regretful husband, I washed romaine lettuce and dandelion leaves.  Dandelion is known to be very good for detoxing the liver, so that was perfect!  (Did you know the largest agricultural production of dandelions is right here in South Jersey?  Yes, it’s  the “dandelion capital of the world.”  In fact, there’s even a festival here in the spring).

But dandelion is so bitter!

So how could I hide it in a smoothie?  With fruit, of course — but not just any fruit — very ripe bananas.  Why overripe?  Because that’s when they are cheaper and sweeter.  I get them at Acme, where they sell ripe banas for 25 cents a pound.  Usually, the outside of t

hem is yellow with a few brown freckles.  I happily buy these cheaper ones, instead of their more expensive, green and tasteless siblings.  At home, I actually leave them out on my kitchen counter for an extra two days or so until they have a lot of brown spots on them.  Then, I peel them, put them into a large plastic ziplock bag and freeze them for smoothies, desserts, and ice cream.  The riper the better!

Moving on to my smoothie creation:  first, I washed and cut the romaine and dandelion into about one inch pieces.  I do not have a Vitamix, so I do precut everything.

I then put one handful of dandelion and two handfuls of romaine into the blender (loosely, not stuffed) with 16 ounces of soy milk. I blended the heck out of it from low to high speeds, and then added one scoop of hemp protein and two tablespoons of cocoa powder.

Next I cut the two overripe frozen bananas into chunks and blended it all until smooth.

Did my  husband like it?  He didn’t even notice the dandelion!  It really was delicious.


One Response to “Green Smoothie (’cause you thought you were so smooth last night)”


  1. Three Minute Vegan Ice Cream « Jerseyveganchick's Blog - November 10, 2010

    […] rich stand-in for these higher-calorie ice creams, and very easy to make.  As I mentioned in my smoothie post, I always keep frozen overripe bananas on hand.  I usually buy them at Acme, where they sell them […]

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